Anyways, so for gluten, it is a pretty nifty and simple process, you must get a flour that has a lot of protein in it, the more the better, because the more protein means the more meatish stuff you get. All you add is water until you get bread dough consistency and then you plop it in to a bowl and pour water on top of it and leave it forever.
Then you have to knead it and rinse it until the milky water goes away but you have to be careful not to make your doughmeat disintegrate! Eventually you shall get something along the lines of this:
Then you stretch it like so and make it in to a roll:
And then it shall look something like this:
Then it must be put into its sock so that it can bathe in its brothy bath for a hojillion hours:
My gluten's sock has fancy, houndstooth ties
Here is my gluten in its broth, steaming and being all nice and warm:
All I am doing now is just waiting and being hungry, apparently making food makes me hungry.